This morning I went to church. I thought my kids would go with me but I made the mistake of giving them an option to stay home, so I went alone. It wasn't torture but I hated sitting there alone and getting stared at or having people wonder who the heck I was and if they were supposed to talk to me. A couple people did say hi, which was reassuring. The talks were nice but I admit I kept myself occupied by working on school stuff. I sat by a noisy family but I understand its hard to manage all those kids.
Overall it went all right. It was your basic meeting. The prayer ended and I ran. It's really awkward to have everyone tell you they missed you or ask where you've been or where the rest of your family is, so I ran. I know they're trying to be nice but its awkward. A plain, "hi, how you been?" or "nice seeing you" would suffice. Not the people gushing about how they knew you'd come back and howthey've been praying over you. Its not that i dont apprciate it, i just think theres other people who deserve those prayers more than me. I told my mom-in-law and she was supportive as well as my father in law. I'm glad to have them accept the fact that we aren't perfect but they love ipus anyway.
They're good folks.
How does Johnny Cash play into all this? It was my self pep talk all this morning as I got dressed. I had a rockabilly station playing and good ole Johnny was singing gospel. The thought occurred to me, Johnny Cash is pretty badass. And he went to church. He believed in God. If Johhny Cash could do it, couldn't I? Strange the things we do to help us do the things we ought to.
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